It's just another day for Barney Ross and his team of equally ridiculously named expendables: (Lee Christmas, Hale Caesar, Toll Road, and Gunnar Jensen) Rescue an old compatriot from prison (name of Doctor Death) then jet off to Somalia to intercept a shipment of weapons. They didn't count on Conrad Stonebanks though... an old frenemy that Barney thought was long dead. (with a name like that though how could you think that?) So after.... look does it matter really? Guns get fired and stuff blows up! It's the Expendables not Citizen Kane! No one came for the story!
(inhale, exhale)
No that wasn't another characters name BTW. How do you judge a movie like this? If you watched the first two Expendables is there really any doubt that you'll see this? If you didn't nothing is going to change. These movie are basically interchangeable and you'll still get the same basic awesomeness. The story lacks of course and unfortunately they toned down the campy violence to a PG-13 level and a new batch of expendables halfway through the movie was a terrible idea. But Mel Gibson hams it up magnificently as the villain, Antonio Banderas goes for big laughs and gets them (essentially stealing the whole movie), and Sly sill struggles with words with compound syllables. I do think that this third installment is the brainfreeze point though and while I usually just take a breather, it feels a little old and may be time to retire. (sorry Stallone, age jokes had to happen) B-
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